Get The Hell Out of Your Life

Bill Downs: A Tale of Tragedy, Faith, and Forgiveness

Ron Meyers, Bill Downs Season 5 Episode 3

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When Bill Downs from Saucier, Mississippi, opens up about the shattering loss from a drunk driving accident, the weight of his words carries a raw, transformative power. His compelling journey, marked by profound grief, anger at God, and eventual reconciliation with faith, is a testament to the human spirit's capacity to seek light amidst the darkest times. Joined by Dr. Andrew Farley, we explore the steadfastness of God's love and the path to healing that can begin with one pivotal moment of forgiveness.

My own narrative intertwines with Bill's as we consider what it means to look at life through 'grace eyes' rather than 'religious eyes.' The transition from living in fear of condemnation to embracing the freedom and love offered by Jesus Christ is not just personal; it's a universal shift that can redefine your existence. Through my story, I invite you to reflect on the joy and liberation that come from laying down your burdens and opening your heart to the transformative power of grace.

This episode isn't simply a collection of stories; it's a mosaic of hope, love, and the enduring presence of Jesus in our lives. Whether you're searching for meaning in the midst of loss, yearning to shed the shackles of religious expectations, or seeking a deeper, more authentic connection with your faith, our candid conversations aim to support and inspire. We encourage you to share your experiences, drawing strength from the resilience and love that bind us in our collective journey toward a life filled with purpose and divine guidance.

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Speaker 1:

It's time now to get the hell out of your life. A weekly broadcast with real people sharing real struggles and offering real hope. Today's show will encourage, inspire and empower you to face life's challenges with a bold confidence and renewed hope. Now let's join our host, ron Myers. The Provider.

Speaker 3:

Hello, my friends, it is so good to be with you. Well, if you are living in the cold part of the country and you're freezing, I can relate to it. Man, it got cold here in South Mississippi, but it didn't stop me from having my conversations with Jesus. And I know one thing that if I'm freezing to death like my brother up in Iowa who told me it was over 20 below zero, 18 inches of snow, I know, then I'd have to say, Lord, I need some spiritual anaphories, I need to warm up with you. And you know what it works. Jesus is with us in the cold, in the hot.

Speaker 3:

Have you ever thought of that? Can you walk away from Jesus? Is Jesus always with you, even in the bad times, the good times? What about when you stumble? What about when you fall? Does he leave you and say as soon as you straighten up, Ron, I'm coming back? Well, right after you hear today's story, Dr Andrew Farley will answer that question. What if you walk away from God? But first let's listen to today's story. The story is from a gentleman that he and his wife received the dreaded phone call the one you know that no parent wants to receive.

Speaker 4:

My name is Bill Downs and I'm from social Mississippi. On October the 6th 2007. My son and his wife of three and a half months their best friend that lived with us and that we had grown to love as a son were going to the movies, driving down Highway 53 and they were struck and killed by a drunk driver and her passenger. The drunk driver was also killed. It was a head on collision Brad and Samantha, which, Brad, is my son. They were killed instantly and the young man that was with them, chris, died in route to the hospital.

Speaker 4:

I came up on the roadblock, oh my goodness. And when the county sheriff deputy deterred everybody down county farm, when I turned him down county farm, I called my wife and told her that there was a big wreck and it's right there in that big curve and it healed just past Canal Road going west. Had no idea it was the kids and in the process of driving around taking the detour that they were directing us. I actually received a phone call from my wife saying that she could not talk to the kids on the phone. Be it intuition, whatever, I tried to get back to the crash. I had that gut feeling that there was something wrong. And in the process of going back I turned down 53. When I come off of county farm and when I got to the little airport there I ran into a highway patrolman who then told me you know, I need to go back. Did they know who you were? I don't know if I imagined it or if it actually happened, but I remember him saying Mr Downs, you need to go home. But I've never showed him my ID so I don't know that he. You know, I don't know that that actually happened, but he told me to leave the area. When I got back to county farm, my wife called back again and said that she couldn't get hold of the kids, for whatever reason. I backtracked, so you do, something was up. I just had this fear that it might be the kids. I went back to the roadblock where I started and Gulfport PD had joined the county share and they even threatened to arrest me if I didn't leave the area. And I chose that time to go to the movie theater with which they were going to the movies, to make sure that Brad's car was in the parking lot, and I couldn't find his car. So I went back to 53 to wait for the orders from the wife. In the meantime, she was on the phone with dispatch and you know highway patrol people like that trying to find out what was going on, and it wasn't until she told me that there was two victims transported to Garden Park. I went to Garden Park trying to find out something there, and that's when I received the phone call from her.

Speaker 4:

Wow É, simply said, cath, inherently out of patience in alcohol addiction, were you an active member in church? Did you believe in God? Yes, I believed in God. I believed that I was a Christian. I was pretty active. Your normal job blow. You know, I was an elder in the church.

Speaker 3:

And I asked that because my first reaction would be I'd be kind of mad at God.

Speaker 4:

Well, at first I was in shock. I do remember calling the head elder and telling him I don't need nobody down here, I just need to let y'all know what happened. I don't think I was really. I don't want to say I wasn't a Christian, but I don't think I was an acting Christian at the time. You know, I was talking the walk, but I wasn't walking the walking, fortunately. But my first initial feeling was shock, and it wasn't actually until we got the autopsy report and all this stuff back. You know, we found out that she was a drunk driver. Not only was she drunk, but she had drugs in her system, plus she was texting.

Speaker 3:

Did you turn to God during this for comfort, or did you get angry at God?

Speaker 4:

I think I was more concerned and comforting my wife. She basically had a breakdown and I think, together, you know, we comforted each other and, unfortunately, instead of turning to God, I turned against God. I became very angry with God. I felt that these two kids were just starting off in life. They'd only been married three and a half months. Why would God destroy them, so to speak? And it wasn't until I had a breakdown. You know, like I said, I turned against God. I left the church, I left God, I emotionally left my wife. I had never actually grieved my son, but instead of turning to God, I felt like it was his fault that my son and daughter-in-law, and a young man that I loved as a son, was killed. I wanted to hurt God. I couldn't get it, god, so I turned to my wife. I put that poor woman through hell, here, I mean, but she never gave up on me. She'd never stopped praying.

Speaker 4:

The turning point in my life was at the four-year mark when, I guess, I suddenly realized I had never grieved my son and instead of turning to God, I thrust all that anger at God, at my wife, and on December, the 6th of 2012, she had enough. You know she doesn't believe in divorce. Neither one of us do. But she said that's it, I can't take it no more. The pastor was. I was dealing with my pastor. You know he was trying to convince me that. You know that God was not the enemy. You know he was our friend and on December the 6th, like I said, she basically threw me out of the house. I tried to commit suicide. I was over it, I wanted to end it.

Speaker 4:

So what was the turning point? The turning point was and when I think of this I think of Moses and his experience with God. You know, he actually met God through the burning bush and I came home back home that night and basically curled up on the couch she had locked the bedroom door and I don't know if I passed out, went into so emotionally fatigued and I mean it was like two o'clock in the morning We'd been, you know, fighting all afternoon and she was one of the ones saying she was, you know, begging me to try God, to get help, to go marriage counseling, to go to grief counseling, and then somehow you had a God moment.

Speaker 3:

Oh yeah.

Speaker 4:

In my life it was. You know. I dreamed, had a vision, whatever, me blaming God, telling him I wanted nothing to do with him, and he's like are you sure this is what you want? I say, yes, I want you out of my life. And in my mind he turned his back on me. Oh, my goodness. And for I don't know how long. It seemed like a lifetime, but you know, I've been in.

Speaker 4:

I used to do cabin when I was younger and I'd go into these caves and you could actually feel it. It was so dark. You could feel the darkness. That night I felt like I had become the darkness and I heard him tell me this is what every center that denies my name will experience at judgment was the eternal separation from God. And I don't know how long it lasted, but I felt like I was experiencing that eternal separation. From that eternal separation and, wow, thank God, my wife never stopped praying for me and finally he answered her prayers and somewhere in the spec of all that hurt and pain and hate, her prayers were answered.

Speaker 4:

When I woke up, she was already sitting there beside me. Oh, wow. So God prepared her. Oh, yeah, I looked at her. I said please forgive me. I have been a fool. I literally begged her to forgive me. I told her call a counselor today. I need help, we need help. Praise God, we started going to counseling. We started going to grief counseling. On February the ninth, I stood before my church and I was rebaptized. She rededicated herself through faith and then that night we renewed our vows.

Speaker 3:

You took a tragedy and you turned it into good. Tell the listeners what you're doing.

Speaker 4:

I have volunteered for mad mothers against drunk driving. Being a volunteer for mad gives me a voice for the victims, Not only my three kids, but the victims that are here on the Gulf Coast. They have lost loved ones due to a drunk driver and I give my testimony once a month to a room full of people that have been arrested the first time for drunk driving and I try to appeal to them as a father that has been through the fire Amen.

Speaker 3:

You were at the gravesite of your children. Share with the listeners what you had told me.

Speaker 4:

I stood there at my son's gravesite and after I, I guess, apologized for not being what I felt was a better father, I told him that until the day I die I will be his voice and if I can just talk to one person and convince one person not to drink and drive, that I've accomplished my task. But now that I have given my life to Christ because on December the 7th I accepted Christ I feel for the first time as my savior. I have got this hunger to know more about Christ, to know more about God. My wife and I pray together every single day. We read the Bible together. We're very active in church.

Speaker 3:

You know, you went through a season in that valley and in the shadow of death and even though God was with you, you didn't know it. God doesn't want any of us to go through any struggle by ourselves.

Speaker 4:

That's the thing I have learned in the last year is that everything is choice. Everything that God deals with is our choice. Do we choose to reach out and take what he's offering, or do we choose to turn it inward and do it by ourselves?

Speaker 3:

Boy. What a powerful story. I could just feel the pain that Bill was going through. So there was a part in his story that he said that he imagined that God turned his back on him. Will God turn his back on us? Can Jesus walk away from us if we walk away from him? Well, I turn to one of my favorite teachers, dr Andrew Farley from the Grace Church in Dallas, texas, and he will answer that question right now. What if we walk away from God?

Speaker 2:

So what if you walk away from God? Did you know the reality is, wherever you go, there he is Because Christ lives in you. And if you're one with Jesus Christ, no matter what, then you can't go anywhere that's away from his presence. You house the presence of Christ himself in the person of the Holy Spirit. Christ in you, your only hope of glory. Just think about it. God has already made you so many promises. I'll never leave you. I'll never forsake you. Nobody can snatch you out of my hand.

Speaker 2:

You're a slave of righteousness. Does a slave of righteousness ever really want to walk away from God? Sure, you might get sick of church and church people. You might get sick of religiosity. You may be hurt by a particular congregation or group, and so you want to walk away from them and get away from the pain. Well, who wouldn't? But that's not walking away from God. Do you realize? You're a person of God's own possession. It's impossible to walk away from God if Christ lives in you.

Speaker 2:

Remember what salvation is. He took out your heart of stone. He gave you a new heart, a righteous heart, a heart that is in agreement with him. So you're never going to want to walk away from God himself.

Speaker 2:

We're told in the scriptures that at salvation, god poured out his love in your heart. That means that you have a love for God and a love for other people that God himself put there. It's a finished work. Ephesians 6, verse 24, says you have an undying love for Jesus. How could a person who has a love for Jesus that will never die and never fade away, how could that person walk away from God? The reality is, god has this rigged. He knew exactly what he was doing. Remember, in the Old Testament, the Israelites. Well, they betrayed the Lord. They walked away from the Lord. They certainly weren't faithful to him. But today God has everything rigged. The New Covenant is the solution to those old covenant issues. Through the New Covenant we discover that we have something unshakable and unbreakable and you will never walk away from God because you're the temple of God. Wherever you go there, he is Christ in you, your only hope of glory.

Speaker 3:

I just love Dr Andrew Farley. If you have a Bible question, go to his website BibleQuestionscom and type in your question. When I return, I'll give you a spiritual eye exam.

Speaker 1:

You're listening to Get the Hell Out of your Life with your host, ron Myers. Real stories, real struggles and real hope.

Speaker 5:

Does God speak to us today? If so, what does he sound like? Thundering roars, crashing waves, a booming megaphone? Maybe, sometimes, but maybe it's not quite as Hollywood, dramatic as all that. Maybe it's a little more simple. John 10, 27 says my sheep hear my voice, I know them and they follow me. In the midst of all the noise and questions, god is speaking and we can hear his voice. We just need to learn to recognize it. So what does he sound like? He sounds like love, like reconciliation, like kindness, wisdom, hope, truth. Do you know those sounds Then? Maybe you hear his voice more often than you think. Maybe you're being led by him more than you realize. Maybe God is speaking to you and you actually are listening. You just didn't know it.

Speaker 3:

I love that song. Let me tell you about my Jesus, and if you haven't listened to this show very long, that's what this show is all about Myself and others sharing what Jesus has done in our life. Because, friends, when you really understand what Jesus wants to do and will do in your life, it changes everything. And sometimes it's the teachings that we've been taught that never really Introduces to full grace 100% grace, no law, no additives. It's all about Jesus. So, thinking about that, before today's show, I want to give you a spiritual eye exam. Now, this spiritual eye exam is one I took a few years ago and I Failed it. I failed it. I I Was looking through religious eyes instead of grace eyes. So here let me give you the test and let you make your own decision of what your eyesight is.

Speaker 3:

Now you might have religious eyes if you See shame, condemnation, you look at other people and find their faults. You feel like you're never good enough. You lack trust. You really don't know if God is for you or against you. You may think that God is out to get you and you see doom and gloom around every corner. You can't wait to be with Jesus one day when you leave this world and all you see is the world going to hell in a hand basket. That is religious eyes. Those were my eyes a few years ago.

Speaker 3:

Now you may be looking at life through with grace eyes if you see love, freedom, compassion, right standing with God, close intimate personal relationship with Jesus. He's your savior, but he is also your friend, your confidant. You trust him. You don't fear him. You know that he will never leave you or forsake you. He's not against you, he's for you. You anticipate life. You don't worry about what might come in your way because he goes before you to prepare you for the difficulties of life. Gray size celebrate life To totally different perspectives of doing life with Jesus. Both will take you to heaven, both will have you saved, as long as you've asked Jesus in your heart.

Speaker 3:

The problem with religious eyes you can never Achieve what you're after. You can never Not stop sinning. You can never not Become good enough for God. You're always trying to do something and if you fail or stumble, you have so much shame, so much Condemnation that you basically stunt your growth as a Christian because you finally just say to yourself Maybe nobody else, I can't do this. And, friends, that's what happened to me. I Was duped. I really felt duped all the years that these people told me that if I did this, god would be closer and I could do this and everything would be hunky-dory. But that isn't true. That is not the gospel that Paul talks about of the new covenant.

Speaker 3:

Grace takes in account the words that Jesus said on the cross, his last words. It is finished. We are not under Moses, we are under the new covenant. We have the freedom To become who he created us to be. We have total forgiveness when Christ comes into our heart. There is no shame, there is no condemnation.

Speaker 3:

So let me ask you, who do you think would have more fun in life?

Speaker 3:

A person with gray size or religious eyes? I know a lot of you are saying well that grace, it just makes you sin and do this. No, it doesn't, because the more you understand what Jesus does for us and will do for us, we become allergic to sin and addicted to Jesus because we don't want to do things to disappoint him. We will stumble, we will fall, we will still make mistakes, but we are not graded by a report card from Jesus. He has our best interests always in mind and, friends, we are living at a time, right now, where the world really does need to see Jesus. They don't need to see religion. They have that in all the other teachings. Christianity is the only thing that gives us freedom. Christ dwells within us and he gives us his Holy Spirit to do life, because he needs us to become ourselves.

Speaker 3:

If you don't become you, who will Nobody? The world misses out on your gifts, your talents, your skills, because you're trying to perform like a circus animal all these rituals and you make 10 steps forward, but then one day you make one step backward and you can't even. You cuss yourself. Maybe not bad words, but you just realize that I'm a worthless, goofy Christian and I can't keep up with what God has for me. Well, he never told you to.

Speaker 3:

He wants you to trust him, believe in him. He will never leave you. He will never forsake you. You can't walk away from him. He is yours and he has seen the hurts in this world, the pains in this world, and people pray every day Lord, if you love us, you wouldn't do this. No, he's saying listen, I came to give you life, and life more abundantly. He also said if you these words are very powerful come to me all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest, for my yoke is easy and my burden is light. In other words, let's rest in the finished works of Jesus. Let's become who he created us to be. Do you think God wants you to walk around with doom and gloom and building bomb shelters because you're worried the world's gonna come to an end and you're gonna be trapped? You need to store up on food. I can't even imagine living life like that.

Speaker 3:

But hey if that's what you do, that's that's your thing, go do it. My thing is I'm here to do what I can to help a hurting world, encourage someone. If I touch one person a week, then I've accomplished what I've set out to do, because we're all in this together. So again, like Ann Wilson started off with that that bumper music, let me tell you about my Jesus in his head. He has some freedom for you today. All you have to do is ask him, have him reveal to you more about this loving, awesome grace that is available to anyone that will ask.

Speaker 1:

You're listening to.

Speaker 3:

Get the.

Speaker 4:

Halal of your.

Speaker 6:

Life with your host.

Speaker 1:

Ron Myers Real stories, real struggles and real hope.

Speaker 6:

We would like to express our gratitude to Coffee News for their support of this program. Are you tired of scrolling through the same old news feeds every morning? Then switch things up with Coffee News. Our publication is filled with interesting stories, brain teasers and uplifting quotes that are sure to brighten your day. And now you can access Coffee News anytime, anywhere, by visiting our website. So, whether you're sipping your morning coffee at your favorite cafe or browsing online from your desk, we've got you covered. Start your day off right with Coffee News at ReadCoffeeNewsOnlinecom.

Speaker 6:

Ron will be back in a minute to close out today's show. We want to remind you today of the last words of Jesus it is finished. What is finished? The finished work of Jesus refers to the complete and final accomplishment of salvation through his death and resurrection. It means that Jesus has done everything necessary for our forgiveness, redemption and reconciliation with God. Through his sacrifice on the cross, jesus paid the price for our sins once and for all, providing total forgiveness and cleansing. This finished work of Jesus means that we no longer need to strive or work to earn God's favor or forgiveness. We can rest in the assurance that our salvation is secure and that we are fully accepted by God because of what Jesus has done for us. Now back to Ron.

Speaker 3:

Well, friends, my time is up and I have been so blessed that I have been able to spend a few minutes with you today. I hope you've been encouraged, empowered and inspired, because God has something so wonderful for you. If you would like more information about Dr Andrew Farley and the Grace Church, just do a google search. His message of grace and no additives is liberating. It is freedom Until next week. This is Ron Meyers, reminding you that I love you, jesus loves you, and when you give him your heart, he will give you your destiny.

Speaker 1:

Get the hell out of your life is underwritten by the Christmas City Gift Show. We invite you to come shop with over 255 vendors from all over the United States from November 8th through the 10th inside the Coast Convention Center located on the beach in Biloxi, Mississippi. You can find more information at ChristmasCityGiftShowcom. Thanks for listening, and if you would like to share your story of what God has done in your life or listened to previous episodes, please visit our website, thepromoterorg. Join us next week for another episode of Get the Hell Out of your Life Real stories, real struggles and real hope.