Opening And The Question Of Grief

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It's time now to get the hell out of your life. A weekly broadcast with real people, sharing real struggles, and offering real hope. Today's show will encourage, inspire, and empower you to face life's challenges with a bold confidence and renewed hope now.

Ron Meyers 0:21

Hello, my friends, and welcome to Get the Hell Out of Your Life. I'm your host, Ron Myers, and before I begin, I must ask you something. Have you had your conversations with Jesus this past week? We'll talk more about that a little later in the show. But today's big question is this What do you do when someone you love is gone, but your life keeps moving forward? Grief is something none of us can completely prepare for. It doesn't follow a calendar and it doesn't ask permission before showing up. You may feel strong one day and overwhelmed the next. A song, a photograph, an empty chair, or a familiar place can suddenly bring everything rushing back. Now life has taught me that grief is not a sign that your faith is weak. Grief is the evidence that your love was real. Jesus never told us that believers would avoid sorrow. In fact, the shortest verse in the Bible may be one of the most comforting. Jesus wept. Jesus understands what it means to hurt. My guest today is Maria, and we're going to have an honest conversation about grief, what it looks like, how it changes us, and how God can carry us through something we could never carry alone. This episode also connects with something I'm beginning to share more often, destined for success. Biblical success does not mean living without pain, it means continuing to trust God, take the next step, and become the person He created you to be, even when life doesn't turn out the way you planned. So if you're grieving today, you do not have to pretend that everything is okay. Just take a breath, open your heart, and listen. Maria, welcome to the show. What's your

Maria Introduces Matt’s Story

Ron Meyers 2:33

story?

Maria Etheridge 2:33

Okay. Well, my name's Maria, and I'm from Gulfport, Mississippi. I've lived on the coast most of my uh life from a child and then also as an adult. And my story is talking about grief. What I'd like to share is just some uh background of what's happened in my life with my son Matt. And just to let you know that he did pass away in April of this past year. And uh let me start by saying first that life is not a bed of roses. Of course, God doesn't offer us anything other than life after death and to make our lives the best we can while we have time on this earth, maybe to leave a legacy or maybe not to leave a legacy, but just leave that imprint, knowing that God guided you through all the different things that you might come across in your life. So, Matt, when he was younger in his 20s, um when he passed away, he was 43. So I had a good time with him, you know, on this earth where I could share my life with him and watch him grow up and have my two beautiful granddaughters. But in his 20s, he wound up having a back injury and he got addicted to prescription drugs at that time. And it wasn't, it was just hard him growing up and being addicted at the time that he was young and trying to raise his children and keep a relationship going. There were times when he would be out on the streets in Kansas after the hurricane. Katrina, he and his little family moved to Kansas where my ex-husband was. And he wound, you know, going through several different uh storms in his life where he was living on the streets, he was trying to get over the drug addictions. And back about four years ago, he moved back to the coast after he got a divorce from his wife and left his two uh daughters up in Kansas. So um Matt was a great music person. I mean, he could play any kind of instrument, he could sing, he wrote music. Um, his abilities were just awesome. He was I'm not just saying that because I was his mom, but he was just so musically talented. And I was hoping that he got some of that from me because I love music. I love to sing, and I sing on my praise team at church. But he was trying to get his life together, and I could see that he was making that effort. And throughout all those times that he was living on the streets and I didn't know what to do because I was down here in Mississippi and he was up in Kansas, God kept compelling me constant prayer and supplication. So I followed God's will on that. I I knew I there was nothing else I could do because you have no control over another

Addiction, Prayer, And Letting Go

Maria Etheridge 5:10

person, especially an adult child. So about April 16th, he had had a back procedure done that Monday on the 15th. But when he came in town, he was just, he worked over in Panama City and lived over there. But he would come in town to visit on the weekends and then go to the doctor's appointments and so forth for his back. So about April 15th, he went in the procedure, but he was just he you could tell there was something wrong. And so he wanted to go back to work the next day on Tuesday, the 16th, but I kind of talked him out of it. And that night, I could tell there was something wrong. And I told him, I said, we need to go to the doctor and find out what's going on with you. He actually went into cardiac arrest that night at my house. At your house. Oh, goodness. Yeah. So I I tried to resuscitate him. I checked for pults and did all that. And then I called the um 911. Of course, the ambulance came. It seemed like it took forever. But he was in the hospital for a whole week before he passed away. But during that time, they kept telling me, you know, that he was not alive anymore, that is, he was brain dead and that, you know, we just needed to make a decision. But I had over 3,500 people praying for him and our family, which to me it was just miraculous in itself. You know, even if he was to die and we had to pull the plug or whatever, just that miracle of 3,500 people praying, and maybe more than that. I don't even know what the, you know, total numbers were, but the more people I kept asking to pray, they kept telling other people. So, you know, God had his hand in that part of it. The other part was he was an organ donor, and I didn't even know that about my own son. And when

Cardiac Arrest And The Honor Walk

Maria Etheridge 6:55

we did the donor walk, we had we had a donor walk at the Singing River Hospital and Community Road, and there was over a hundred people in the hallways on that day on the uh 15. I'm sorry, it was the 23rd. And there were over a hundred people in the honor walk for him donating his organs. And we were all ready, you know, to go ahead and take the organs once he passed away. So we sat in the room with uh doctors and the nurses, you know, waiting on him. They had taken him off a life support on the 23rd that afternoon, but he he didn't go. And for whatever reason, he wanted to stay longer. So my ex-husband and I were in the room. My granddaughters were there, but they didn't want to be around that night. So that night we just sat with him and prayed and just enjoyed some time. My ex-husband and I just sat there as his mom and dad and him. And my ex-husband said to me, he said, you know, I think he just wanted it that way. Just me and him there, like it started. So wow. And then it was just phenomenal, though, all of that happening. And then he passed away a little bit after midnight on April 24th, 2024, which is kind of a you know, the date itself is just kind of, you know, and my ex-husband said, That's just like Matt to do something like that, you know. So it was just, you know, even though it's such a sad and painful thing, I think the only reason that you get through something like that is your faith and hope in God.

Ron Meyers 8:26

Is your faith is what got you through that? Because I don't know how I could have done that without faith.

Maria Etheridge 8:30

Yeah, and just the support and knowing that people were praying and cared so much about us and what happened with him. My my ex-husband's not super spiritual and my granddaughters don't even have a Christian values. Although my son was Bible versed, he could read the Bible from front to back and tell you every scripture in there. He was So he had a relationship with Jesus? Yes, he did. And that day, that day when he went to the hospital on April 16th, we were sitting in my living room, and he told me that somebody, a lady, came in the house and talked to him. He said, I don't know who she was, but she was sitting right here because I was sitting on my couch and he was on my love seat. He said, I was sitting on the love seat and she came in the house and was talking to me. She was so sweet and so kind, he said. So I have have that feeling that the angel came to see him and prepare him for death.

Ron Meyers 9:24

You know, I've done a lot of interviews in my lifetime, and that is something I hear quite a bit. And it's amazing what God does. You know, the Bible says that he wishes that none would perish. And I believe God sends angels, whatever he has to do, to the time that we enter into his rest to just let us know, hey, it's gonna be okay. You know, I'm here for you. Wow, wow. Yeah, that had to be comforting for you as a mom to hear about it.

Maria Etheridge 9:53

Yes, it was, and I kept thinking that's got to be an ad. So it took me a couple of months to get everything because it was so traumatic having to try to do that resuscitation on your child. He had he coded three times, uh twice at my house and then once when he got to the hospital, once in the ambulance, so it was four times actually. But um, he just had this peaceful look on his face, like he was happy.

Ron Meyers 10:18

You and I are talking here in in January of uh 2025, and you have a glow. I mean, you're a believer, you have a glow on you. Uh it's just hard for me to see how you can even talk about it.

Maria Etheridge 10:29

It's just something that God's compelling me to do. I think he wants me to reach out to others that may have a more difficult time dealing with the pain of death, especially if it's a loved one, a child, because a parent shouldn't be burying their children. But we don't have any guarantee

What To Say In Despair

Maria Etheridge 10:45

on anything. He could have taken me first, you know. I don't know.

Ron Meyers 10:48

Well, speaking of that, Maria, if somebody out there right now says, Oh boy, she is right, because I just buried somebody very special to me or a child, and I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't even want to live anymore. What would you tell that person?

Maria Etheridge 11:04

Well, I I mean there's days that you feel like that. I mean, there's days you may not want to get out of bed or you don't want to talk to anybody, but you just have to keep that hope and that joy because if not, it'll kill you. I mean, you'll go just as fast as they went. And there's a reason why God keeps us here. You know, maybe it's for me to share my experience and share what I feel about Jesus and how he's helped me through it. I I just don't think I could have made it without it.

Ron Meyers 11:31

In fact, I'd like to ask my guest, who is Jesus to you?

Maria Etheridge 11:36

Jesus to me is everything. I if I don't have him in my life, I just don't know where I'd be. I mean, he's brought me through so many things, especially the time when Matt was out on the streets and stuff. If he didn't tell me to pray, what would I have done? There's nothing you can do to control something. You can't you can't control death. God has the last word on it, right? I mean, he's gonna say, or what are you gonna say to him? Okay, Lord, I don't want to die today. I mean, just think how crazy that is. Because he's everything. I mean, he's the way that makes your life every day. You get out of bed because of him. And and people that don't have him, they have nothing to hold on to.

Ron Meyers 12:17

And a lot of people I hear, especially with this show, ask me, Well, how can you believe in a Jesus when there's so many bad things going on in this world? And I I don't have all the answers. No, but Jesus does, and I know he personally saved my life, and he fills me each day with a joy and a peace. And I don't know what today's gonna bring, but I know he's gonna put me in the right place at the right time, just like meeting you.

Maria Etheridge 12:41

Yep. And just like me being here, you know, because maybe I can help somebody else out that doesn't understand the relationship that you need to have. I've got some things that I could say about death because I read a lot now, trying to find answers and trying to find the comfort and peace. So death is an opportunity for you to see God's glory and be revealed of his promises of everlasting life. So I know I'm gonna see my son again, and I have that hope and that promise because God said it, you know, and I know it's true.

Ron Meyers 13:14

Amen. And that is exactly, I think, of my mom and my dad and friends that aren't here, but I look forward to the day that we're all together.

Maria Etheridge 13:24

Yeah. And you know, Jesus cried and suffered through pain and suffering, like when Lazarus was dying or, you know, declaring.

Ron Meyers 13:32

He said Jesus wept.

Maria Etheridge 13:33

And Jesus wept, and he felt bad for Mary and Martha because that was his best friend, apparently, you know, from what the Bible verses say. So he was in sorrow, you know, he was sad for them, you know, and that shows how he's, you know, cries with us and he's in pain with us. And I know that he's always there. And I can't find comfort in people sometimes because everybody's dealing with their own things. You know, they all have their own crosses to bear or things that they're trying to work through, or grief may come in a different way. They might have lost a relationship or a job or whatever, but the only person, the only thing that you can turn to is the Holy Spirit and Jesus, because there's there's no people that don't have something going on that they're trying to deal with.

Ron Meyers 14:19

Well, I know one of the things that God has put in you since your this experience with your son

Finding Purpose Through Love And Service

Ron Meyers 14:25

is your wisdom. You are sharing some wise things out there that people need to hear. And what else would you like to tell them about death?

Maria Etheridge 14:33

Just that life and death are temporal. You know, we're only here for a short time. So what you do with that time is so important. And and you need to share love because Jesus was all about love.

SPEAKER_10 14:45

Yeah.

Maria Etheridge 14:45

And love your neighbor no matter what they're going through. I mean, I have people call me up. I still work now, I could be retired, but I think God gave me the gift of and a blessing of being able to still work and have something to do. And then I also do volunteer work and I sing at my church and I have a a music ministry that I do. It's a karaoke ministry. But I find joy in reaching out to others and just sharing some joy in a life that maybe they don't have that, especially in nursing homes and places like that.

Ron Meyers 15:14

I tell people quite often, Maria, that if you know someone that doesn't believe in Jesus and doesn't go to church, maybe perhaps instead of inviting them to church or giving them a Bible right off, why not just share what Jesus did in your life? Because so many people don't know what Jesus can do. If people hear enough from us that Jesus did this for me and he will do it for you, it makes people curious. They want to search. Okay, wow, he really did that for you. Would he do it for me?

Maria Etheridge 15:46

Oh, yeah. That's the thing about it. I I think for non-Christians, they're still searching for something. You know, some people call it the universe. Well, what's the universe? The universe is God. I mean, something had to create this massive universe and the planets and people and animals and things. When you even look at like the Garden of Eden, for example, there's still prominent things from there. The beautiful roses or the beautiful flowers or a loving dog. You might have an animal that you love so much. There's so many things left God left with us.

Ron Meyers 16:22

So if somebody asked you, with all you've gone through, what's the one thing that's helped you now get through life? What's one life lesson that you can share with someone?

Maria Etheridge 16:31

Just hope and believe. I think if you have that hope and you believe that you're gonna go one day too, we don't know when that is, but we just need to trust that God knows it all. Wow and that he's got a plan for you while you're still here, then make the best of it. Why would you want to be depressed and not live in your life? Your children wouldn't want my son wouldn't want me to be that way. And I know my family, you know, they worry about me and everything, but they always tell me, You're doing so good. Even my church group, you know, people at church said you still have the joy. And I said, Well, I'm still alive.

Ron Meyers 17:09

The joy of the Lord is your strength.

Maria Etheridge 17:11

That's right.

Ron Meyers 17:12

Well, we're almost out of time, but before we go, would you just pray for our listeners and whatever the

Maria Prays For The Grieving

Ron Meyers 17:20

Lord puts on your heart?

Maria Etheridge 17:21

Yeah, and I I'd like to also welcome them to contact you if they need prayer, because I'd love to pray for them. Uh, even if you're not a believer, just pray for your heart and just to give you some comfort somehow, some way. Sometimes somebody else praying for you, even if you're not a believer, can give you some comfort. So I just want to pass that on to your listeners. But dear Jesus, we're just so thankful for this time here with Faron and um his ministry, Father. He's he's spreading your word out to so many people, even believers and non-believers alike, Father. So just bless him. Continue to uplift this ministry. And we also pray for those that have lost loved ones, especially those that have lost young children, father, to uh sickness or disease, father. That's got to be so heartbreaking because they had so little time with them to love them and care for them. So I'd like to lift up those parents that have lost little children, parents that have lost uh their children, whatever age they are, father. It's still painful. We want to offer them the peace and comfort that only you can give them, Father. Just love on them. Give them a sense of hope and peace, Father, that only you can do. And we just ask that you continue to uplift all those that are suffering from grief, Father, whether it be from the loss of a loved one, from the loss of a job, from the loss of a relationship. No matter what it is, Father, you know how to handle it. You know what to give them to help them cope with it, Father. And you just know how to love them, Father, like no one else can. We just ask that you're with them, that you continue to uplift them and bless them and keep them in your care, Father, forever and ever. And we pray in your precious name.

Healing, Guilt, And The Next Step

Ron Meyers 19:06

Maria, thank you so much for trusting us with your heart and your story. Conversations like this remind us that grief is not something we simply get over. We learn how to carry it. Over time, with God's help, what once felt impossible to carry can become part of a story that comforts and strengthens someone else. My experiences have taught me that healing does not mean forgetting. Healing means the memories no longer control every part of your life. You can remember, honor, cry, smile, and still keep living. That is important because some people feel guilty when they begin laughing again. They feel guilty when they enjoy a good day or start thinking about the future. They wonder, if I move forward, does that mean I am leaving the person I loved behind? No, it doesn't. Moving forward is not moving away from love, it is learning to carry that love with you into the life that remains. And this is where destined for success connects with Maria's story. Success with God isn't measured only by accomplishments, titles, money, or applause. Sometimes success is getting out of the bed when your heart is broken. Sometimes it is asking for help. Sometimes it is making it through another anniversary, walking into church again, or choosing to believe that your life still has meaning. You can be grieving and still be destined for success. You can have unanswered questions and still trust God. You can miss someone deeply and still believe that God has more life for you to live. The Bible says in Psalm 34:18, the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Notice that it doesn't say God watches the brokenhearted from a distance. He says he comes close. Here's Ron's step for this week. Give yourself permission to tell Jesus the truth. You don't need polished words. Tell him what hurts. Tell him what you miss. Tell him what makes you angry, afraid, or confused. Then ask him one simple question. Jesus, what is my next step? Now don't demand the entire plan. Just listen for the next step. It may be calling a friend, it may be joining a grief support group, it may be going for a walk, returning to church, helping someone else, or simply allowing yourself to rest. Whatever the next step is, take it. Your grief is part of your story, but it does not have to be The final chapter. God is still writing, and your life still has purpose. I'll be back in just a minute to wrap up today's show.

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Final Encouragement And How To Respond

Ron Meyers 24:40

So, my friend, if you are walking through grief today, please remember this. You are not broken because you are grieving. You are not failing because healing is taking longer than you expected. No, there is no deadline for grief. Be patient with yourself and stay close to Jesus. Make it a habit to begin your mornings with a conversation with Jesus. Before the news, before social media, before the demands of the day begin, take a few moments and say, Jesus, I'm here. Walk with me today. Those daily conversations with Jesus are healthy. They can set the tone and direction of your day. They remind you that even when you feel alone, you are never walking alone. If today's conversation with Maria encouraged you, would you share this episode with someone who may quietly be carrying grief? Sometimes the greatest gift we can give is letting another person know I thought about you and you are not alone. And if you have a story of hope healing or a fresh start, visit thepromoter.org and click share your story. Your story may be exactly what someone else needs to hear. I will be back next week with another grace-filled episode of Get the Hell Out of Your Life available wherever you listen to podcasts. Until next time, keep having those conversations with Jesus. Keep taking the next step, and keep believing that with God your life still has purpose, and you are still destined for success. Remember, you were created on purpose for a purpose by a God who loves you more than you can imagine. Now go live like you believe it.

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